Sometimes it comes to me like a fog on a very cold morning. Sometimes it comes to me like the proverbial thief in the night, without warning. I can only imagine how you feel when the darkness envelopes me. For in those moments I cast you aside and fall deep into my own pit. No screams. No cry for help. Just me seeking my own space. I see how that pushes you further and further away from me. It is not my intent I promise you. I too do not know how to deal with me in those moments. I do not want your pity nor your shoulder. I do not want your words of reassurance. I do not want you to tell me I will be ok. I just need you to let me be. To let me deal with my own demons like I have always.
Do not feel rejected. I implore you. Please know that even in those moments I love you dearly and wish you didn’t have to see me in my sunken place. I want nothing but laughter and joy and sunshine and yellow and blue flowers but alas, my mind is like a Rubik’s cube. Beautiful yet complicated. It is a beautiful jigsaw when the pieces aren’t placed neatly together. An unfinished painting full of potential and promise. The beauty of a work in progress, a dream yet to be fulfilled, a goal unattained. I promise to try to be better in your presence. To hide thy dark moments from you so as to not stain this bond we have created. All I ask for from you is patience. All i ask is that even when i’m deep in the shallows, you do not abandon me.
Look at him. All over her. Acting all high and mighty as if he is the alpha male. Just because he has the baddest bitch in the room. What a fool he is. He seems deeply in love with her I can tell. The fool. Look at how he looks at her. With adoration and love and affection and all that sweet pussy boy shit.
“hey. How are you bro? hope you don’t mind us being here.”
“No. you guys are welcome.” He says.
“Thank you, man.”
What a jerk. It’s clear he doesn’t know I fuck his girl. LOL.
The house was beautiful. Set in the deep forests far from anyone and everyone it stood alone. Trees provided the much-needed shade and clean air. The birds chirped in musical unison providing a beautiful soundtrack to his days while crickets and owls sang at night. He didn’t much in his house. The décor was minimalist. He kept only what he needed. Two chairs, a table, a bookshelf and a TV adorned his living room. He had a bed, a stove and a fridge. His girlfriend insisted on getting a few more things. Where would they go?
But he loved her.
He walked into the restaurant where he was supposed to meet his girlfriend. The place was as inviting as it was comfortable. He had been here before. They had had meals in this place and it had formed a part of their memories. He loved coming here. Today felt weird even before he stepped in, but he walked in anyway.
“hey, you’re finally here. You are two hours late.” She said.
“I’m sorry I’m late”
“its fine babe. Meet my friends. Thought we’d have a group date.” She says.
He walks in not knowing one of them was her lover.
She slowly slid down his shaft, feeling every inch of him as her walls parted to accommodate him. He was hard as steel yet as warm as a winter fire. She could feel him pulsate inside of her and the feeling was driving her insane. She bit her lip as she felt his strokes navigate her meat wallet ever so rhythmically. She wraps her legs around him as if to lock this moment in forever. He switched pace and his now urgent thrusts were about to break her dam. Then suddenly he stopped, then plunged deep. She squirted then collapsed.
I didn’t want our first to be a debate. I didn’t want our first to be a tough decision we’d have to make. I didn’t want our second to be our first just because our first was not given a chance to be our first. But we weren’t ready. So it’s our fault we even had to make that decision in the first place.
Would you have a bubbly personality like your mother? Or a relentless but sometimes reckless personality like your father? We will never know.
We foolishly played god with your life. May God continue watching over you.
She took another shot of Vodka and looked at him with anger in her eyes, “You were with that whore, again weren’t you?”. She looked dangerous and homicidal in that moment. A chitenge wrapped around her waist and a black vest covering her breasts, she stood looking straight at him seething. He looked around the kitchen to see how far the knife was. A precaution. She took another shot then laughed maniacally. He took a few steps back scared of what might happen next.
Later that night they made love like they had never before.
And he swore never again.